WINsday Inspiration

"So many of us women struggle when someone gives us a compliment. Somebody says, “Girl, you look amazing!” and... what do we do? We wave it off with, “Oh, this old thing? I just got it on sale.” Or they say, “You did such a great job,” and we hit back with, “Oh, it was nothing.”

That’s not humility, that’s old survival mode talking. See, a lot of us grew up learning that standing out could attract jealousy, criticism, attention, harmful sexual attention, trouble or we were told we were being too vain. Maybe you heard messages like, “Don’t get too big-headed,” or “Don’t think you all that.” "Get out of that mirror. " I was told, "Who do you think you are?" Some women who have been sexually violated feel uncomfortable with attention from men, or told they were called stupid, ugly, too vain, or unworthy and some learned to dim their light as a way to survive. They carried those painful words and experiences like heavy coats, hiding their brilliance, their voice, their sensual curves, and their beauty so they wouldn’t risk being hurt, ridiculed, violated, or rejected again. So somewhere along the way, your nervous system decided it was safer to stay small, quiet, and invisible.

Society hasn’t always made it easy for Black women to shine. The minute we’re confident, somebody wants to call us arrogant, intimidating, or “too much.” So we dimmed our light to keep the peace. When somebody compliments you, what’s the first thing you do? You start shooing it away like it’s a fly at the picnic!

See, a lot of us were trained from way back that shining too bright, being “too much,” or standing out could bring shade, jealousy, or even danger. Maybe you had a sibling, cousin, classmate, or a family member who side-eyed you when you got praise. Maybe a parent only celebrated you when it benefited them. Maybe you learned to stay small so you wouldn’t get picked on.

I don't believe God put all that brilliance, strength, talent, gifts, creativity, love, and beauty in you for you to hide them. Receiving a compliment isn’t about being conceited. It’s about saying, “Yes, I am worthy. Yes, I receive this love. Yes, I will shine.”

You don’t have to explain it, discount it, or shrink back. You can just smile and say, “Thank you.” Period. That’s it.

A key part of my messages and mission is to assist women in transforming outdated beliefs, nurturing the inner child who believed it was unsafe to shine, and embracing the ability to receive without feeling guilty. Sister, there's no need to diminish yourself any longer. Accept the compliment. Embrace it. Radiate with it. Your light not only benefits you, it uplifts everyone around you. Don't shrink...SHINE." - Jewel Diamond Taylor

To view photos from my recent Women on the Grow Malibu reTREAT click here

email - JewelMotivates@gmail.com with questions, book speaker, or schedule one-on-one life coaching session by phone, zoom, or Facetime.

call or text 562.735.5916

CashApp $gratefulJDT

Zelle Jewel Taylor (Use email JewelMotivates@gmail.com)